"You are somebody’s reason to smile."

This one’s about a beautiful relation called friendship. It’s about compassion, it’s about being there for someone.

My first post on this blog was about friendship. When I had written it, I was 24 and not as wise as I am today. But when I read it, I know that I valued my friendships then and I value them now.

A lot of people come and go in our lives, some are there to cherish forever, some were an important part of your life at some point and some were just seasonal.

I met a friend yesterday. We used to talk everyday until a few years back. But life had plans which made us drift apart. We went our separate paths, to cross each other’s every now and then. And after growing some greys, and with every new “crossing of paths”, I look back and learn – learn more about the person, learn more about myself.

Sometimes you learn that the friendship you shared was more meaningful than you thought. That you made a difference.

That you are still the reason for them to smile.

And that realisation reinforces my faith in this relation every single time.

If each one of us keeps our egos at bay, and holds on to each other, sometimes selflessly, with a pure heart, 
the world, I am sure, will be a much better place to live in.

It’s a beautiful relation – cherish it.

“A true friend accepts who you are, 

but also helps you become who you should be.“  

What do we live for?

I was talking to my bestie today (only a 2 hour long talk) and we got talking about this and that as we had a lot to catch up. We were talking on the phone after 8 long months (we live in time zones that have barely 2-3 hours of overlap). We had been in touch of course, but only on dispersed whatsapp chats. People who have best friends and love talking about everything under the sun know that keeping in touch on whatsapp in as pseudo as buying a fake Prada (There’s a reason why I chose this illustration!).

That’s what has become of the new generation. Globalisation, IT, hectic lifestyles – everything is eating into our quality time. Our time with our families, with our partners, with our friends, with our neighbours, with our community.

Why?

What happened to us? What changed in the world? Why did our work make us unavailable to the people we most care about? Are we so lost in the rat race that we’ve forgotten our priorities? Is success in work the only parameter we live for? Are we truly happy with our lives?

If we are not happy, what can we change to make our lives better?

Tell me something – what is it that we are working so hard for? To buy things that will make us happy? A house, car, the latest iPhone, clothes to make us look great, showpieces to make the house look pretty.. be my guest and add on to the list! How many of these are our needs and how many are just add-ons to give us short-term happiness?

Is buying a Prada going to make us happy while we bust our ass at work, away from our family?

The day we realise what’s important to us and what we can let go of will be the day we start to live a truly “rich” life. Rich in happiness, rich in love and rich in compassion.

On Climate Change & Consumerism

I am going to write about consumerism. I know it is a topic not well received. Not a lot of people want to hear about it.  And as usual, I don’t want to be preachy because I am not that kind of a person. The only person I have successfully been able to preach to in the most serious manner possible is my husband. Because he has nowhere to run :P

But on a serious note, the issue of consumerism needs to be dealt with if we really want to save the environment, save the planet and if we are even half serious about the “Paris Climate Change” conference and it wasn’t just for some VIPs to have a vacation in a dream destination!

So, I will tackle this issue not from the nations’ or governments' viewpoint, but from your and mine and every common person’s. 
Because unless we change, the world as we see it - will end by 2050.

I haven’t researched numbers, I don’t have the statistics. But over the course of this blog, I will share links and videos that have, and they will alarm you (unless you are Ebenezer Scrooge!).

Do you want to know how you are destroying the planet (and your kids’ lives)?

The answer - Shopping.

The solution
An analogy - Let's lead our life as if it were a "Kopi C Kosong".

What’s Kopi C Kosong?

It’s the kick you need every morning. It’s the zing in the day. It’s the Indian equivalent of Adrak-Chai. You might remember a mention of it in “The Singapore Story”. Kopi C Kosong is Singapore’s version of Coffee with evaporated milk and no sugar.

Kopi      – coffee

C           – some milk

Kosong  – no sugar (*Kosong in Malay means “Nothing”.)

Our life should have…

zing to keep you fresh, alive and active. The basics = "Kopi"

a little hint of luxury and pampering = "C"

Nothing beyond that. Nothing what’s not needed. 
Nothing that spells Greed = "Kosong"

Take a peek into your life. Are you doing things you should not? Are you buying things you don’t need? Look around the room you are sitting in right now (even if you are in the bathroom!) and tell me how many of those things are essential to your living? Is there anything on those shelves that is eating dust, never been used? Open your wardrobe. How many of those clothes are lying around since the time they were bought just to end up getting donated a year from now? Go to the kitchen. Do you have dozens of plates and cups and forks and you use only 2 of each every day? Do you have two dinner serving sets– fancy and fancier – for fancy and fancier guests? Yes? Whaaaat…are you Monika from F.R.I.E.N.D.S?

Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson

Exhibit A:

21 Surprising Statistics That Reveal How Much Stuff We Actually Own

Exhibit B:

The following video explains quite simply what's been going on and what happens when we think of our shopping as completely harmless. It is a 21 minute video. That's a lot (?) of time from your busy schedules. But not that much if you want you and your kids (or kids you are planning) to survive in the next 35 years.

Look at this video of the Story of Stuff. (Come back when you are done!)

Now think of all those 10yr old children working 14 hours a day in China and Vietnam and elsewhere to make stuff available to you at cheap dollars, just so that this stuff can end up unused in your closets. Even if you use them, do you really want to? These kids gave up their childhood so that you can flaunt a new dress everyday and don’t have to repeat clothes for 4 weeks. And the number of environmental resources that were wasted - what value did they create? Nothing.

Your shopping is not harmless - not for you, not for the environment. 

Here’s how climate change is going to take place:

1. By 2050, there will be 1-2 degree of global warming unless greenhouse gas emissions are reduced over the next 10 years. If that does not happen, “The first symptoms may be minor. A person will feel slightly nauseous, dizzy and irritable. It needn’t be an emergency: an hour or so lying down in a cooler area, sipping water, will cure it. But in Paris, August 2003, there were no cooler areas, especially for elderly people. 14,800 died.”

2. Between 2-3 degrees of global warming, “Preventing mass starvation will be as easy as halting the cycles of the moon. First millions, then billions, of people will face an increasingly tough battle to survive.”

Think about it.

And think harder if you plan on having kids who will be at the age of a mere “33” in 2050.